Here are some of the reasons I think young adult children can stray from God.
- The legalism they see in church and church goers.
- Proclaimed Christians acting judgmental and critical.
- Christians who mess up, make bad choices, and condemn others who do the same.
- The world we live in has so much suffering, and "bad things" happen to good people.
- Caught up in the wrong crowd.
- Make so many bad choices that they become lost and hopeless.
All of us, Christians or not, are sinful by nature. We mess up, screw up and fail miserably. People are people. Christians don't have magical powers or divine protection from doing the wrong thing. We still have choices, and we can still pick the wrong ones. What we do have is the holy spirit to alert us to when we have sinned. We also have the grace of God to forgive us when we repent of our sin. God then calls us to action to make amends for our sins effect on others. When we don't do this, we are not a reflection of Jesus, and we cause others to stumble in their relationship with God.
When people talk negatively about Christians and church, I always ask them, "Are you looking at the people, or are you looking at God?" Churches are run by people, not by God. These are human, flawed people. Some of them are so caught up in the "rules" that they forget the message. Jesus did not hang our with the Pharisees, he sought out the prostitutes, the broken down, the hopeless. He did this because he wanted to give them a relationship with God. The gift is in the relationship.
It takes money to run a church. There are light bills to be paid, outreach, counseling, addiction, parenting classes, youth programs, Sunday school supplies, hospital visitations and bereavement help, and people who work at the church. When churches send the collection plate around or talks about giving, people get turned off. The church is simply trying to provide people with all the amenities they can offer, and it takes money to do that.
There is a world of suffering out there. Children are starving, sick and dying. Men are murdering and beating people. Wonderful people are suffering with Alzheimers and dying from horrible cancers and diseases. This is fact. There are many books written on how God can allow suffering in our lives, but the short answer is God's ways are beyond our own comprehension. For whatever reason, God chose to make man how he is, with free will. God suffered when he sent his son to die a terrible death just to save our own neck.
There is possibly nothing more frustrating than people who claim to follow Jesus, and act nothing like it. It is frustrating because it is a misrepresentation of Jesus. Jesus was all about the truth, but he was equally all about grace. He opened his arms and embraced the lost ones. When Christians gossip, are critical and hypocritical, when they are mean spirited and unforgiving, when they have no grace or mercy, when they condemn others for their mistake and shortcomings, they are not reflecting Jesus. Jesus was all about the "misfit toys" on the island of misfit toys in Santa Claus. The best answer I can give to this problem, is to remember that ALL of us are sinners, Christian or not.
We have all heard the phrase, "you are who you hang out with." When we hang around lost people too long, we become lost too. When we are steeped in ungodly actions we become immune to the "shock" factor in them. Pretty soon what used to be a red flag becomes second nature to us. We become immune to morality and right thinking.
When we are making bad choices and are aware of them, we tend to hide. We flee from anything that will uncover our disguise and reveal the truth. That means God. If we stay in this state too long, we will become lost.
If your child is lost, or has turned from God, there is hope. There is always hope. God is there, right beside your child. He loves them too much to leave them there. Scripture tells us in Proverbs 22:6 "Train up your child in the way in which he should go, and when they are older they will not depart from it." They may stray. They may question, but deep in their heart is the seed of God. And remember it only needs to be the size of a mustard seed. Pray for them. Give them to God. He will find them.